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12 Principles of Forgiveness

The acclaimed author and teacher explains the principles that are integral to the process of forgiving according to Buddhist philosophy.

This is Water by David Foster Wallace

David Foster Wallace‘s 2005 commencement speech to the graduating class at Kenyon College is a timeless trove of wisdom.

This is Water

“Greetings parents and congratulations to Kenyon’s graduating class of 2005. There are these two young fish swimming along and they happen to meet an older fish swimming the other way, who nods at them and says “Morning, boys. How’s the water?” And the two young fish swim on for a bit, and then eventually one of them looks over at the other and goes “What the hell is water?”


Author unknown.

Approximately thirty-thousand world leaders attended the Environmental Earth Summit in Rio de Janeiro in 1992. When the Dalai Lama was scheduled to speak, the tent was full, and the audience was excited. He walked onto the stage, looked out at the people, and said, “Above all, have compassion.” He then left the stage. There was nothing else he needed to say. 

When we think of compassion, we think of being kind to street people or those who are physically handicapped in some way. I am gaining a new understanding of this virtue. That is, to have compassion for everyone in whatever challenges they might be facing at any moment in time. To look with love at the mother who is screaming at her child in exasperation is an act of compassion. We don’t know what hardships she might be facing in her life that she is taking out on the child. We don’t know what model she had for parenting or how she was treated as a child. We don’t know what loss she may have just experienced. We can only love her just as she is. 

We don’t know the pain of a grossly overweight person whose eating habits are out of control. We don’t know that she was brutally raped as a child. We don’t know how she was jostled at the hospital or interrogated by the police. We don’t know that she took three showers a day to wash away the guilt and the disgust. We don’t know the fear she has of getting close to anyone because her mother was embarrassed by her rape. We don’t know that her father couldn’t look her in the eye afterward because of his pity for her. We don’t know that she thought her parents hated her. We can only love her just as she is. 

We don’t know the terror of a top executive who loses his job and doesn’t know how to live differently than he has. We can’t imagine his fear of being judged by his peers or by his children. We can’t imagine the humiliation he might experience in looking for a job or the frustration of being “overqualified.” We don’t know what it’s like to live with such a high level of adrenalin, created to deal with all the stress and anxiety. We can only love him just as he is. 

We don’t know why our father was so demanding. We don’t know that he was ten times harder on himself than he was on us. We don’t know that he never felt loved by his mother and that nothing he ever did was good enough. We don’t know when he insisted that we do chores that he wanted us to be able to do anything so that we would never be without money. We don’t know why he worked so hard, and we never saw him. We don’t know what he felt inside when he saw his father’s house sold at auction for taxes during the Depression. We can’t imagine his pain or his opinion of himself when he went bankrupt. We can only love him just as he is. 

We don’t know why that woman is promiscuous and has so little respect for herself. We don’t know that she was sexually abused by her stepfather. We don’t know that he said he’d do it to her little sister if she told. We don’t know that when she finally said “no,” he raped her little sister. We don’t know why her mother didn’t believe her. We don’t know that she never felt safe, even in her own home. We don’t know that she just wants someone to love her back and take care of her. We can only love her just as she is. 

We don’t know why our boss is always so cranky. We don’t understand the challenge of running a small company or not having quite enough for payroll. We don’t know the disappointment when the salespeople don’t make their quotas, and the bills still have to be paid. We don’t know what it’s like to deal with government regulations when you’re just a little one-man operation. We don’t know that his wife just asked him for a divorce. We can only love him just as he is. 

We can’t imagine why our teacher is always so hard on us. We don’t know that her fourth-grade teacher told her she was stupid and would never amount anything. We don’t know how much she loves us and wants us to succeed. We don’t know that she’s been watching her brother being eaten away by cancer. We don’t know that she just gave her sister-in-law the money she had been saving for new shoes. We can only love her just as she is. 

We don’t understand why our daughter tried marijuana. We don’t know that she’s terrified of becoming an adult. We don’t know that she’s only seen us struggle and felt our unspoken fears. We don’t know that she experimented with sex because she didn’t feel loved. We don’t know that she’s afraid of relationships because her parents divorced when she was two. We don’t know that she’s afraid she’ll never see her father again. We can only love her just as she is. 

We don’t know why our son became so angry. We don’t know that he had just seen his best friend with stitches all over his face and that it was another friend who beat him. We don’t know that he’s afraid of making new friends or not being accepted because he doesn’t do drugs. We don’t know that he is afraid to choose because he might make the wrong choice. We don’t know that he doesn’t want the same things we wanted because he never saw us enjoy life. We don’t know that he loves us even more than we love him. We can only love him just as he is. 

We never know what another person is experiencing. They never know what we might be going through. All we can do is offer compassion to ourselves and others all the time and ask for it in return. Just love me exactly as I am.

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Be That One Person

By Buckminster Fuller

We are not going to be able to operate our Spaceship Earth successfully nor for much longer unless we see it as a whole spaceship and our fate as common. It has to be everybody or nobody.

We are called to be architects of the future, not its victims.

War is the ultimate tool of politics.

To expose a 4.2 trillion dollar ripoff of the American people by the stockholders of the 1000 largest corporations over the last one hundred years will be a tall order of business.

Humanity is acquiring all the right technology for all the wrong reasons.

What is your level of Consciousness?

Did you know that the higher your Consciousness, the more results you get? Consciousness can be measured on a scale. There are 7 Zones or categories of Consciousness. Download free slides, workbook and bonus $125 gift now! >>> https://goldzoneleaders.com/slides/

The World’s Major Religions – Who is Right?

This video from TED-Ed by John Bellaimey is a very good summary of the world’s top five religions.

I am right, no, I am right.

I believe that everyone, regardless of their faith, belief or religion should study all the major religions with an open mind. Naturally, many people believe that there can only be one true way, one right way and that all others are wrong. This thinking is black and white and does not take into account that the rainbow is comprised of many different colors and even black and white have varying shades of gray between them!

Thinking that in order to be right, others must be wrong automatically, is the cause of a lot of misery, wars, fights and needless suffering. It plays out in our bedrooms and our boardrooms.

The Magic Mantra

Ek Ong Kar Sat Gur Prasad

This is the story of the Ek Ong Kar Mantra and how it became my much loved and favorite Magic Mantra for connecting, releasing and transforming negativity into positivity and optimism.

Screenshot 2015-10-06 22.36.00

First a little history, a couple of love stories and a little culture.

Anjou was born in the city of Ludhiana, located in the Indian state of Punjab. According to her parents, Anjou was conceived at the foothills of the Himalaya on their honeymoon.

How you get your start in the world is everything.

What Is The QUEST?

Do You Live Your Life Like You Are On a Quest?

The essence of the Quest is where you leave your comfort zone, known reality, sense of security, and attachments and step into the unknown to discover your true nature, destiny, unique gifts, qualities, values, and virtues.

During your journey to discover your true self, you encounter the limiting parts of yourself, weaknesses, limiting beliefs, blocks, self-suppression, unexpressed feelings, insecurities, jealousies, and doubts. In other words, you encounter your dark side. You also discover and encounter any opposition to your visions, goals, and dreams.

On Self-Knowledge

– By Kahlil Gibran
And a man said, “Speak to us of Self-Knowledge.”
And he answered, saying:
Your hearts know in silence the secrets of the days and the nights.
But your ears thirst for the sound of your heart’s knowledge.
You would know in words that which you have always know in thought.
You would touch with your fingers the naked body of your dreams.
And it is well you should.
The hidden well-spring of your soul must needs rise and run murmuring to the sea;

The Wise Man, the Goddess and the Fragment

An adult bedtime story…

Once upon a time there was a wise man.  This wise man travelled the world exploring new places and learning the mysteries of life.  One day without warning, and as if by magic, the wise man forgot who he was.  He forgot that there is more to life than power, money, sex and the relentless pursuit of success.  He forgot his wisdom.  He forgot his teachers.  He forgot the examples he had seen.  He forgot the lessons he had learned.  He forgot where he had come from.  This once wise man disowned himself.  He left his seat at the table, the table of the gods.

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