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Tag: Honesty

Honesty

Honesty by David Whyte

Honesty is reached by the doorway of grief and loss. Where we cannot go in our mind, our memory, or our body is where we cannot be straight with another, our world, or our self. The fear of loss, in one form or another, is the motivator behind all conscious and unconscious dishonesties: all of us are born to be afraid of loss, in all its forms, all of us, at times, are haunted or overwhelmed even by the possibility of a disappearance, and all of us therefore, are but one short step away from dishonesty. Every human being dwells intimately close to a door of revelation they are afraid to pass through. Honesty lies in understanding our close and necessary relationship with not wanting to hear the truth.

The ability to speak the truth is as much the ability to describe what it is like to stand in trepidation at this door, as it is to actually go through it and become that beautifully honest spiritual warrior, equal to all circumstances, we want to become. Honesty is not the revealing of some foundational truth that gives us power over life or another or even the self, but a robust incarnation into the unknown unfolding vulnerability of existence, where we acknowledge how powerless we feel, how little we actually know, how afraid we are of not knowing and how astonished we are by the generous measure of loss that is conferred upon even the most average life.

Honesty is grounded in humility and indeed in humiliation, and in admitting exactly where we are powerless. Honesty is not found in revealing the truth, but in understanding how deeply afraid of it we are. To become honest is in effect to become fully and robustly incarnated into powerlessness. Honesty allows us to live with not knowing. We do not know the full story, we do not know where we are in the story; we do not know who ultimately, is at fault or who will carry the blame in the end. Honesty is not protection; honesty is not a weapon to keep loss and heartbreak at bay, honesty is the outer diagnostic of our ability to come to ground in reality, the hardest attainable ground of all, the place where we actually dwell, the living, breathing frontier where we are given no choice between gain or loss.


Director: Mark Pellington in collaboration with Poet David Whyte.

Courtesy of Nowness. Ana Rosado is a freelance fashion and culture journalist based in London. 

The pioneering director Mark Pellington first came to prominence during MTV’s golden age of the late 1980s and early 1990s. Creating a style led by the innate emotion of music and the darker side of pop culture, his zeitgeist-defining videos take in the hypnotic roaming buffalos of U2’s “One,” the ferocious cut-and-paste energy of Public Enemy’s “Shut ‘Em Down,” and the visceral, saturated colors of “Jeremy” by Pearl Jam. Pellington’s new film project, Honesty, is inspired by poet David Whyte’s liberating essay of the same name. Dealing with loss, powerlessness, and fear, the work is more akin to a performance art piece, with 32 individuals invited to participate in an emotional purge and emancipation of grief. Here Pellington discusses what inspired him to interpret Whyte’s thesis. 

“The words written by David blew me away. They don’t preach but they speak their own beliefs in a very strong and challenging way. Each person was cast randomly having no knowledge of the essay. They were only asked if they had experienced loss. They entered the room four at a time and were asked to simply walk forward, stand in front of the camera and listen to the soundtrack–the poem read by David accompanied by Jeff Rona’s sound design and score. 

“It was a beguiling and odd experiment. I had spent so much creative energy in the past 10 years exploring grief after the death of my wife and my mother. Seeing fresh grief and the processing of trauma in these subjects, some very raw, aided me in reflecting on the universality of this deep feeling and hence made me less isolated, less selfish, more compassionate, and empathetic. It was freeing.

“I’ve thought of releasing the footage as Honesty singles, to let the entire experience wash over you. Not a Warhol type of endurance film, but certainly three minutes of pure processing, seeing the shifts people took listening to the powerful words.”   

Catharsis & Honesty

For some people, this video would be confronting. For others it is cathartic. A film by Mark Pellington – David Whyte essay – Music by Jeff Rona.

Mark Pellington’s words say it best:

“This film was made by me as an exercise in process, to explore my own progress and personal feelings towards loss, grief, and healing. Via this text. My instinct was to be very simple and direct and to understand these words, via catharsis. The conduit was human, the face. The unlying veneer, the carrier of instinct. The face. It evokes the range of emotional expression and human truth of strangers. They all listened to it one time and brought their own inner stories to you the viewer. For you to feel your own. David’s Whyte words inspired this all. Kudos to the cast, Michael Sanford casting, Jeff Rona’s music and Matt Roe’s wonderful images.”

Cheating

Statistics show that at least 50% of men and 33% of woman cheat at least once. Jealousy is the leading cause of battery and violence in relationships…

Little White Lies

Honesty is the best policy:  platitude or truism? How many times are we faced with the decision to be honest or to tell a “little white lie?” No one else may know or find out; however, you know and how do you feel about yourself?

There are many ways to tell the truth without the discomfort that most people avoid. It just takes a little effort to escape the black/white way of thinking.

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