Many people have their self-worth hardwired to their net-worth. I referred to this phenomenon in Towers of Glass, Feet of Clay. Perhaps this is the single biggest reason it is a good idea to build a glass tower around yourself in the first place. So, what happens when the waves of impact touch your reality and this tower is about to blow apart from the tension, shattering everything within its shadow?
For those of us that are fortunate enough to free ourselves from this thought form, it is easier perhaps to keep our sense of self and our self-worth in tact as these waves impact our net-worth. This is not easy, not comfortable, not separate from the tension, and not immune from the judgments of others. Rather, it is perhaps more objective in the way we are able to view ourselves through the process.
Psychiatrists and psychologists report that 80% of their clients who are seeing them for stress related issues are stressed the most about finances and the economy.
Chronic stress leads to many physical problems, and some of these are life threatening. The way you manage this emotionally is everything. BBC News reports that the wealthiest people have been impacted in “Rich List Hit by Economic Crisis” http://budurl.com/64e6. It states, “The financial crisis is taking its toll on the world’s richest people, wiping 332 names off Forbes magazine’s ‘rich list’ of world billionaires.” This represents about one-third of the list and the average loss for those that remain is 23% of their net-worth. Only 5.5% of those remaining on the list increased their income over the past year.
This is truly a reversal of fortune.
How do you communicate to spouses, life partners, children, parents, friends and family what is going on? How do you reassure those that are close to you in the middle of such uncertain and volatile circumstances? It’s challenging, especially when you need reassurance, too!
How do you cope when those closest to you failing to stand by you in your moment of vulnerability when they are used to leaning on you?
How do you communicate the truth without scaring and terrorizing the people around you, when you have been bred to be silent or angry when things are not right? What do you do when they only know you as the provider, the hero, the one who is strong? What happens if everyone close to you has abdicated financial responsibility to you and you have taken it, leaving him or her powerless to fend for himself or herself in this area?
Step one is to re-build, re-negotiate and redeem these relationships from the foundation of who you are, separate from your net-worth. Establish your self-worth as being most important, and free from the highs and lows of the marketplace.
Truthful, honest communication requires a quiet confidence that allows you to be authentic and natural, safe and secure like an oasis in the middle of a dry desert. The challenge is that if your self-worth is hardwired to your net-worth then you will feel ashamed and fearful, and these feelings will suppress your expression, your truth and your spirit.
The other option is for you to get frustrated and angry and this will cause you to be over-expressed and reactive. Regardless of the words you say, the positive attitude you force upon yourself and the feeling you exude is what people respond to. Your feelings are what creates the oasis, the reassurance and the support. Your feelings are what allow those you are used to supporting to either support you or abandon you as quickly as your cash.